So the upside of naming your beerleague team after your sponsor is that you save the monies by having someone else pay your league fees
The downside is that you’re limited in the shenanigans.
Enter the shenanigan free-ish Alair Homes RCHL beerleague team.
I had the fortune of plug tendying for the kind ladies (and token gents) of Velocity for a late Wednesday night timeslot versus the Alair Homes _____ (insert team name here).
Rolling into the Cree, I thought word had got out I was playing as there was a mass exodus of people leaving the resort
Turns out the casino just gave away a car. Well that’s a relief
(insert drum rimsot sound)
... Cricket noises
(taps microphone) Is this thing on?
Anywhoooo
How did I perform for Velocity you ask?
Answer: Post game beer worthy performance.
How so you ask further?
Answer: Fuuuuuuck, just let me tell the story okay?!
I had good vibes rolling this Wednesday night version of Gator Hockey.
Got there an adequate amount of time early.
Got dressed and on the bench just in time to get chatted up by the very nice timekeeper lady Theresa who had nothing but good things to say about Velocity
Got the all-star referee combo of Dean and Jason, and I was off to the races.
Velocity by the way are relentless on puck possession. Its something to behold really. First period saw Velocity strike first off a bingo from Fouracres (primary and secondary to the sisters(?) Moskalski). 5 turns of the minute hand later Jeffery put Velocity up by a pair with a nifty snip via Gray and Woolger apples. Alair quickly sprung the own man on a breakaway shortly thereafter and tucked their lone goal for the night to bed. I just typed this with one hand because the other was patting myself on the back. Period ended with Velocity up 2-1
Second period found some gender inequity on the scoreboard as the whole girl-boy sequence of goals was broken when Lund made the lead 3-1 of a feed from Jeffery and Flamia. Gray made it 4-1 by Jeffrey and the Former Colgate Raider Melissa Kueber, and the period ended with hopes and dreams of free nachos still lingering in the air.
Third period got rolling and with a little back and forth and the aforementioned (look at me using big boy words) Kueber found twine via Mottet and Gray assists to make it a 5-1 game. Grey finished off the scoresheet thanks to Jeffery and Kueber with 2 min left making it a 6-1 final and ultimately making me a happy person rolling my old ass into the dressing room to have myself a room temp post game free beer. Velocity with a PIM free game get treated to free nachos. Free is good
This hopefully makes up for my disaster of a last game with this squad
Other Gator News:
PSA: Men, don’t complain about needing ‘me time’ if you just f-word around on your phone after you put kids to bed. Wives notice…. Apparently… and they talk about it in the dressing room. Not gonna name names
Post game beers are better than pregame beers
Did I mention I only let one goal in?
About mid-way through the second I could hear the Alair team grumble about being beaten by girls… A) They’re mainly moms and teachers. 2) There is no B. C) Tough titties. Every heard of hockeydb?
That is all
#ChompOn you glorious reader you for enduring this